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Pop the Weasel "dead cute" road kill door stopper.



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DOOR WEDGE (Pop the Weasel "dead cute" road kill door stopper)

Another “dead cute” product from our Demented friends “across the pond”!
A road kill door wedge. The door wedge is a weasel called Pop, who never made it to the other side of the road. He has been squashed flat. His little paws stretch out in front of him, and his goggly eye pops out every time you jam the door on top of his flattened body.

Pop the weasel was run over by a sky blue Robin Reliant just outside Scunthorpe last Thursday night. Pop the Weasel comes in a made-to-measure coffin. There are plastic peepholes on the coffin lid, allowing Pop to peer out and allowing you to glimpse the gory details inside.
It’s not water-tight, so watch out for that oozing blood and gore. Inside his coffin there is also a toe tag attached to Pop’s paw giving you details of his demise, a death certificate witnessed and signed by a doctor, and a car bumper sticker, exclaiming: “I love Roadkill.” The first 500 characters are limited edition. Each one has a personalized toe tag.

Pop’s Obituary
28th May 2007, Pop was hit by a sky-blue Robin Reliant on the B23 just outside Scunthorpe and passed away shortly thereafter. Pop was raised in various orphanages, after his parents died in a tragic caravanning accident, when he was 6 months old. From 2005-2007, Pop went through Borstead Correction Institute. This is where he learnt the skills of lock-picking and fertiliser bomb-making. Pop has no known kin. A funeral service will be held on 10th June 2007 at Our Lady In The Field, Whalley Range.

Curriculum Vitae
Name: Pop
Occupation: Weasel
Date of Birth: Unknown
Education: Borstead Correction Institute, 2005-2007
Skills: Picking the locks on chicken coops.
Hobbies: Pulling the wings off blue bottle flies. Eating his own poo.

Certificate of Death
Date of birth: Unknown
Date of death: 28/05/2007
Place of death: B23 just outside Scunthorpe
Cause of death: A sky-blue Robin Reliant
Next of kin: Fender the fox
Last known address: A tin bin in Whalley Range, Manchester

This Squash-plush range of toys looks like road kill. Feels like road kill. But they’re not. They’re plush toys. Very macabre plush toys with a twisted sense of humor. So well made, they almost seem real.

Pop the Weasel, on the other hand, is made out of toughened rubber. Pop’s frail little body has to withstand a lifetime of door stopping. Inside the mold of the body, is a water-filled sack containing a goggly, bloodshot eye. The eye pops out, whenever he’s squished under a door. And unlike real roadkill it’s something you’ll want to take home and cuddle. We’ve tried to make Pop and the rest of his road kill pals as close to the real things as possible. But at the end of the day he’s only a toy. Pop is made from toughened rubber, with a water-filled sack containing goggly eye.
Whether it’s barn doors, porch doors, kitchen doors, library doors, or pool room doors, the toughened rubber allows
Pop to withstand a certain amount of wear and tear. But he needs to be treated a bit of respect, in order for his life as a door wedge to be extended. The water-filled sack containing Pop’s eye is quite fragile. So don’t go having arguments, and slamming doors. And if you do have to have an argument, why don’t you break some plates instead?

Pop’s splayed arms, and the sticky nature of the door wedge material, give Pop stability and friction with the ground. This stops him slipping, when the door is placed on top. We’ve tested him on wood, carpets, lino, laminate and resin floors. He passed the test in flying colors. Although he does prefer being on carpets: it’s a bit more comfy, and there’s even less slippage. Pop’s hindquarters are splayed out behind him. This forms the wedge shape that fits so neatly under doors. His quirky features are all molded and then hand-painted. He measures a statuesque 7 inches from outstretched paw to flattened tail, and 4 inches across from paw to paw. At 11 ounces he’s a fine figure of a weasel. Although the poor thing is only half the weasel he once was.

Pop comes in a made-to-measure coffin. It’s not water-tight, so watch out for that oozing blood and gore. The coffin packaging is made from sturdy card. A warped wood pattern is printed onto it. Lift the exterior lid, and underneath is a plastic lid allowing you to see the gore inside. The coffin is 7 inches long by 5.8 wide. With a bit of prodding and pounding, it allows just enough space for a run over weasel to be crushed inside. The Death Certificate, Toe Tag, and Bumper Sticker are all contained in a compartment underneath the product. The toe tag is made out of recycled brown card, the Death Certificate is printed on A4 paper, and the Bumper Sticker is printed onto a waterproof sticker. So if you want to stop your doors from creaking or slamming, stop them dead with this “dead cute” road kill doorstop.